nightmare

I woke up at 1 in the morning from a nightmare and didn't want to go back to sleep. I put a post up on facebook, and Faith immediately called me. It was only 11 in LA, and she happened to be online. I was so glad. We talked for about an hour, and I was finally able to go back to sleep.

Here's what I can remember:

I was kidnapped by someone I knew in high school. I can't remember who, exactly, but it was a female. She was holding me hostage in a hotel room. She would drain my blood slowly into syringes until I could almost not survive. Then she put some sort of drug in me that made me really dizzy and unable to control myself. Like being super drunk. She laid me down and started removing long strips of my forearms. The strips varied in depth. Some were just the top layer of skin. Some included the muscle and went all the way down to the bone.

Since we were still in high school, she would actually go to school in the mornings and torture me when she got home until it was time for bed. Her father would stay with me during the day to make sure I didn't escape. One day, I was going to the bathroom and I shoved an empty McDonalds bag into the toilet. I was wearing a jumpsuit and was putting it back on when he walked in. I asked him if he even cared what his daughter was doing. I was crying, and it was hard to hold my head up b/c of the loss of blood and drugs. He shrugged and folded his newspaper and said there were perks. She bought him new clothes. I remember he was wearing a wife beater and had 3 day salt-and-pepper stubble and greasy hair. He smelled. But he had an entire wardrobe of beautiful suits that he would wear when he wasn't guarding a hostage.

She would let the others free when she tired of them, but not me. I knew her. And I knew she would kill me when she was done. I flushed the toilet and the McDonalds bag backed everything up. Sewage spilled over the side and all over my legs. The floors were flooded. Just then, she came back. She was furious about the mess.

"Well, we'll just have to clean this up. It has to be done right."

She was really anal retentive, and we spent the entire afternoon cleaning the bathroom. She let me take a shower b/c she would have to take me with her to school the next day. But I wasn't allowed to tell anyone where I had been or what she was doing. My arms had healed. That was part of the thing--she would cut these huge chunks out of my arm. Sometimes she would eat them. Sometimes she would sew them back on. But every morning when I woke up, my arms would be whole again.

We went to school. There were people from all different parts of my life in this one classroom. A boy sat behind me. I forget who, but he was my best friend in the dream. I was trying to tap out my story in MORSE code on his jeans, but I didn't know MORSE code. I was really weak from the lack of blood, but she hadn't drugged me up, so I could function a little better. People just thought I was buzzed b/c I was slurring my words. They all looked down on me.

We had some sort of field trip where we were all on this bridge. People were gathered some other place, so it was just me, my torture girl, and Kanye West, who she decided she didn't like. So she roundhouse kicked him off the bridge into the water below. I ran to the side and looked over. I could see his body in the brown water below. This was my chance to escape. A few people had seen her do it. She would be punished! People started rushing back to the bridge area to attack her. Cyndi Gile was crying b/c she was a big Kanye fan and thought he was dead. As his body floated to the surface, he turned over and was holding a gold ball the size of a basketball and smiling. He was alive. Then he started laughing and swimming around and playing with a seal that had randomly shown up. Everyone immediately forgot about the fact that Torture Girl had killed a man (even though he turned out to be immortal. stupid kanye) and started freaking out about how he couldn't die.

That's when I ran into Matt Millard. He was one of my best friends when I was a kid, and I haven't seen him since he moved away in the 6th grade. I thought if I could just see him, he would know what was going on and would rescue me. He was saying hello to everyone but me. I followed him around in my haze and was finally able to catch up with him. "Hey, Matt, it's me." "Yeah, I know. I already said hi to you." "No you didn't." "Oh. Sorry. You got fat. I didn't recognize you." He walked away.

Everyone was then herded back into the classroom. This was my last chance. I knew that if I went home with her tonight, she would kill me. Shea Scott walked by with an envelope. "Do you think I can make it to the office, or is it going to be too busy with the busses?" I couldn't answer him b/c I was forced back into the room. I passed Jeff Watson, who was already sitting down. He said something that I heard as "Hey, sexy." *If you know Jeff Watson at all, you would know he would NEVER address a female in this manner* I looked at him, eyes popping out of my head. "WHAT?!!?" "I said heysouson." *Which, in my dream, was something in French. At the time I knew what it meant, but I can't remember now* For a moment I thought Jeff would figure it out and I would live. Then torture girl caught my eye and I sat down. I was exhausted from all of the walking around, and terrified of what was to come.

That's when I woke up.

A Post For You!

So, a couple of people have mentioned my blog has been dormant lately. Here is an update. Instead of work. Because that's what I *should* be doing.

July 13 was my last post. I have since moved half way across the country. This was a huge deal for me. I've had two other major moves in my life. One from OH to PHX, and one from PHX to CA. But both of those moves were with another person. Paul and I moved to Arizona together, and Faith and I moved to California. So, I had someone else in the house. Someone who was obligated to hang out with me. This time, though, I'm on my own.

I didn't move to Austin in a bubble. I know a lot of the improvisers out here. That's actually the reason I moved here. I remember staying up all night with Jose at Out of Bounds 4 Augusts ago. We sat by Arthur's pool and laughed and talked for hours. I remember thinking, this is where I want to end up. This is the community I want to be a part of. And I am. ColdTowne has welcomed me with open arms. I am forever grateful to those boys. The three of them helped me unload my Uhaul in the rain. A couple of weeks later they asked me to coach The Draft (one student from each level and an alum or two). I'm TAing this session, coaching two cagematch teams, and coaching the Draft again. I got to sub at CT's conservatory a couple of Saturdays ago and teach an intro to deconstruction. Today I subbed for Arthur at a school, and I'll be working with high schoolers more in the future. Things are going incredibly well on the improv front.

But there is definitely an aloneness to it all. I don't work in an office-I work from home. So I spend the majority of my days by myself. Sometimes it's hard to get out of bed, knowing I won't be leaving my apartment the entire day. But I'm trying to hit the gym a lot. That helps break up my day. And I go to the theater. Sunday nights is Bad Movie Night. Thursdays I've been there for the Draft. I'll be there for cagematch on Saturday, and there are several troupes I still haven't seen. I'm meeting more improvisers each time I go out.

I've already done a show. Well, technically two. At Out of Bounds this year, Craig and Rich picked 4 improvisers out of a hat to do a 20 minute show with them on the last night. I was a name drawn. I knew Rich and Craig, of course, but I also happened to know the other 3 who were picked. It was such an awesome way to be introduced to the improv community! A few weeks later, Emma, Cortnie, Leah, and I did Improvised Golden Girls. I was Dorothy. We submitted for a run in December, so hopefully we'll get that.

I love it out here. I love living by myself. I love my bed and my apartment. I can't wait to get a dog. That's something that will help me with the loneliness and with the getting out of bed and getting dressed. It's expensive, and I'm trying to pay off all of the stuff I bought when I moved out here. I basically had my clothes and a couch. I had to buy an entire kitchen and bathroom and TV and washer/dryer and tons of tiny crap. But I'm going to put my improv money aside for the dog. It's a $300 deposit at my complex, but I'm gonna wait til I have $500 to cover the initial cost of the adoption and food and vet and toys and training. That will give me a couple of months to read up. I want him to be super well behaved and socialized. My dog will rock. Oh, his name will be Professor Snugglebottoms. He will cuddle with me and watch movies and sleep on my bed. Maybe. I haven't decided about that yet. Probably, though...who are we kidding.

Friday I was gonna go visit Leah at work. Just to get out of the house. But no one could go with me. I had asked Emma, but she was at a BBQ and wasn't sure if she'd be done by happy hour time. I almost didn't go. Then Leah texted and asked if I was coming. So I went. I was talking on the phone with Faith about how I just need to go out and do these things. Who cares if I'm by myself? So, I brought a book, fully intending to chat with Leah between tables and drink and read. Then Emma called and said she was on her way. See? It all worked out! I just needed to initiate the scene and get off my duff. Then the yes ands rolled in!

And I keep reminding myself that it didn't happen overnight in LA. Faith and I had each other from the beginning, yes, but I didn't meet Ben til a couple of months in. Stef didn't move til that winter(ish). Jen and I didn't meet til the following April. These were my best buds, and it took time to get that way. Faith posted some pics to her facebook the other day, which made me really sad. I remembered the holiday party and her in the back seat of Ben's car when we both turned around to be blinded by the flash. I remember all the fun we had. And my WSU friends who stuck together. Filming with Behn and Chris. All of the Sunday Morning Movies with B and dessert time with S! I don't miss LA. Not at all. Every time I get in my car in ATX I smile because I'm so happy to live here. But I miss my friends more than I was prepared to. More than I thought I would.

I look forward to making new friends and developing the relationships I have. I look forward to meeting a nice guy who can handle my anal-retentiveness and charm. I look forward to teaching and performing improv. I feel like this is a rebirth. I'm so excited for what lies ahead. I will never forget the people who've touched my life and changed my being. I am thankful everyday for you. I miss you and I love you.

And you always have a place to stay in Austin.

Well, I made it through another X-Ecution. Not on purpose. I told JD after that next week would have to be my last week. I was really nervous talking to him, because I didn't want to let him down. He was super cool and complimentary of my work. I wish I could stay and see this through, but it just got way too complicated with the whole working from home. It's difficult to crash on someone's couch when you have an entire workstation to bring with. But I'm ready to leave and ready for Austin. I hope I can organize a workshop or something to fly JD out for a weekend. I really appreciated working with him the past few weeks, and I feel like I could still learn a lot from him.

As I was sitting at the bar with Jennifer, a group of girls sought me out to tell me how much they liked my work tonight. One girl said I was her favorite improviser, "And I watch A LOT of improv!" I can't even describe how good that made me feel. I'm going into a new scene with new people, and I'm nervous about finding my place. Finding where I fit in to everything. But having a complete stranger compliment my work made me feel like everything was gonna be just fine.

Tonight I saw The Proposal. It was really good. I'm a fan of both Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds, and the two of them in a movie together made me very happy. Mary Steenburgen has had some bad plastic surgery. Her mouth is pulled into a frown when she's not engaging her face.

That is not the point. The point is, this movie made me realize that I actually do feel very lonely sometimes, which made me connect with the main character in a way I wasn't expecting. I have made a conscious choice to be single. LA isn't exactly the best place for serious relationships, and I'm not dating casually anymore. That was for my twenties. I'm in my thirties now, and would eventually like to get married. I have to admit, that's part of the reason behind my move. Guys in their 30s in LA are career focused, as they should be. LA isn't a place people come to fall in love. It's a place they come to work.

I'm in an improv competition currently. JD Walsh is The Man In Charge. We have a workshop every week, which I find immensely helpful. I haven't been on a team with a coach this entire year. I really appreciate the feedback I'm getting from him. One of the things he said recently was to treat the improv scenes the way you would in front of a casting director. That this work should help our auditions for whatever else we do. Well, I don't do anything else. I just really like improv, and want to focus on that.

So, all that being said, LA isn't the place for me. The workshop with JD sort of underlined that fact.

I miss being in love. I miss having someone in my life. And this stupid little romantic comedy made me aware of that in ways I wasn't cognizant. Some of the thing she said about forgetting what it's like to have a family...I understood. My family is sparse and spread across the country. Cousin in San Diego. Aunt & Uncle in Peoria. Sister in Tempe. Parents in Ohio. I'm moving to Austin. There was a scene when Andrew puts his arms around Margaret to warm her up after she'd fallen in some water, and my heart hurt for a second. It really surprised me.

I'm a cuddler. I love holding hands or snuggling and watching tv. I haven't had that in a very long time. It made me miss Foxy Boy a tiny bit. Not that he was ever into that stuff, but if I wanted to go out and grab a drink or see a movie, I could call him. Sometimes it's just nice to be around a member of the opposite sex, even if you're just friends. If I boil it down, I think what I miss most is being that comfortable around a guy.

I work at home. I live at home. I have to make a conscious effort to go out and be around people. The Margaret Tate character was very much a work-o-holic with no personal life. I don't work that much, but I certainly don't go into an office every day and have the opportunity to be around other people.

I'm nervous and anxious for this move. I'm ready to be out of LA and live by myself. I'm also very self sufficient and happy with my life. But watching this silly little movie tonight made me connect with a part that I suppose I've tucked away. I guess I'm just the type of person who needs human contact, and I've been sorely lacking in that department as of late.

It's interesting when art reflects life.

Just a couple more weeks til the big move.

More importantly: Just a couple more days til the big movie!!!

I'm not getting anything done. I wanted to work a full day, so I did 4 hours this morning. Then I headed to Verizon to change my plan and reprogram my phone. I expected this to take an hour. It did. Then I came home, hoping to work. Instead I took some quick photos of Faith and sent texts to my phone book about the number change. I didn't put my last name in the message, so about 35 people text messaged me wanting to know which Ashley this was.

Then I get an email from JD, the guy who heads up the Ultimate Execution, which I crashed last year. I legitimately auditioned this year, but wasn't expecting to hear anything until Wednesday at the earliest, since they were doing two auditions. He tried to call, but couldn't, as I put my old number on my audition sheet*. He emailed me asking me to call. So I did and left a message. Then I responded to his email. Then a friend tried to call, and for some reason couldn't get through. So I sent him another email letting him know I was having phone issues. I was then on the phone with Verizon for a half an hour til we figured out the problem. I refrained from sending JD yet another email letting him know everything is in working order. Yes. I am That Girl.

He did return my call just now and informed me that I'd be in the Ultimate Execution. Very exciting!

Oh, I also spent 30 minutes on the phone with TDAmeritrade b/c I couldn't get logged in. So now it's almost 8 and I have yet to do work this evening. I always feel terrible when I have Marlynn scan a million claims for the weekend and I don't get to them. I tried to work all day Sunday, but the system was down. Tomorrow I've gotta get up super early to get at least 5 hours in before my tattooing. Yep. I'm getting the Eye of Rambaldi on my right wrist and the Deathly Hallows on my left one. Geek City. Population: me.

Come support me on June 8 at the X-Ecution!












*I am a genius

Plane Tickets purchased/rental car reserved for the end of June. Heading to Austin for the apartment hunt.

It's getting closer.

I'm getting nervous/sad. I don't deal well with change, and I'm gonna miss my friends so much.

The most awesome email received in a long time. From my friend Marcus:


Subject: My most fond memory of you:
Taking a shower at your apartment and hearing you tell me that you did not want me to use your bar soap to wash my genitals because you hate pubic hairs on your soap. I laughed for the entirety of the bathing process; almost.

This is my shower.




By the way, did I mention my parents are coming tomorrow?

Faaaannnntastic.

What a weekend!

Went to the Phoenix Zoo for the first time. It was great, but I wish I'd brought my 70-300 lens. Talked with Austin people and understand the situation a little better. Got encouragement for future stuff. Not to be all cryptic, but I have some awesome opportunities that I don't want to jinx til it's official and I'm out there. Met some awesome people. Actually, there was only one troupe I didn't know this festival: ToySoup from Utah. They had probably the most talked about show this weekend. I know troupes get a copy of their performance. Hopefully they'll put theirs up online so I can link to it.

Did the Neutrino show with Shaun from Bare, Jenn Hoffman, and Tommy Schaeffer filmed. I did last year's show on Shaun's team, too. It was super fun. I got to hip toss Shaun and put my stage combat skills to use. Even Saturday night people were shouting Rape Toss at me. It ran so smoothly. It's hard to come back to LA and face LIMP. It has potential, but isn't being well run or executed. I did Neutrino for a year in PHX, and I have ideas about how to help LIMP improve. But I'm not a producer, and I don't feel like it's my place to say anything. And it's not like I'm coming from the You Need To Do This To Be More Like Neutrino angle. I'm coming from the I Am A Part Of This Show And Want It To Succeed angle. 10 people were in the audience at the last show. Nando was learning how to run the board with Ari two hours before we went on. A person who had never even been to a rehearsal ended up shooting the final scene. These ingredients do not a good show make.

Anyway. Thursday night I crashed on my sister's couch. Her condo is in this huge complex that consists soley of college kids. I've been there on the weekend and it's party central all night long. Lindsay lives on a corner, so there's plenty of traffic. Well, it was a Wednesday and I thought the noise level wouldn't be too bad. I was wrong. At 3 in the morning, a huge group of drunk assholes were yelling Fuck You to each other. There was no real fighting. Just screaming that phrase over and over and over again. I stared up at the ceiling and fantasized about going out onto her balcony with a gun and shooting it into the air to get their attention. I would kindly ask them to either break it up, quiet down, or go inside to proceed with the fucking of each other. Instead I got up and peed, which woke up Sass and opened a whole new can of worms. He, of course, wanted to sleep with me. But it took him an hour to figure out if he wanted to sleep on my feet or by my face or on my stomach or in the crook of my knees or on top of my legs or cuddled up next to me or under my hand so I'd be more inclined to pet him. By the time he finally figured it out, he decided he wanted to be with Lindsay and Chris again. Needless to say, I started my busy ass Friday with little sleep.

Friday night was a late party night, but I was able to sleep til 9 b/c it was totally dark! I love hotel rooms! My room at home faces the sunrise, so it's bright by 6:30 am, and I can rarely sleep past that. Faith was trying to sneak out to get breakfast--she knows how precious little darkness I get. But I wanted to eat free food and figured I'd just go back to sleep til we had to check out. No such luck. Everyone from PIF was at breakfast, so we were there much longer than intended. Brent was ready to go to the zoo earlier than expected, so I showered and got ready. Then it was outside in the sun walking around for a few hours. This is perfectly fine, except I know that when I don't get enough sleep, I get sick. I didn't want to pay for a second night at the hotel, so I didn't have a nap area. When we got back, I found Jose and Jacque and went up to the PIF room to change shirts.

Man, I miss my AZ friends more than I realized. Seeing everyone this weekend...I don't know what I was expecting, but it was really hard to leave. They are just an amazing group of people and I love them all. I can't believe how blessed my life is. I have been fortunate enough to befriend pretty much the most awesome kids on this planet. And not just Phoenix--all over. Being in PHX made me even that much more excited for Austin. The improv scene in LA isn't the tight community it is in PHX and ATX. That's what I miss. Being a *part* of something. LA is the loneliest place on the planet. There are so many people, but they are so wrapped up in their own little worlds. Phoenix reminded me how much I love that family feeling. Now, don't get me wrong, I love my LA peeps, too. I'm gonna feel the same way about them when I move to TX. But there's just something different about the communities. Too hard to explain.

Anyway, by Tommy's party Saturday night I was already pretty sleep deprived. And then I ended up not sleeping at all that entire night. I drove back to LA and got stuck in traffic at the windmills on the 10. There was an accident that backed up traffic for over an hour. I finally got home, but the second wind had kicked in, so I couldn't fall asleep immediately. Monday morning I didn't have the opportunity to sleep in due to the construction. That continued to Tuesday as well. But Monday was when the sickness kicked in. I'm not contagious; it's just my body's way of reprimanding me for having too much fun. It's just a bad cold. I slept for about 3 hours Monday night due to fevers coming and going. Today is my first day feeling better, even though not at 100%. Hopefully a good night's sleep tonight will get me there.

Friday is the premier of Woke at the Newport Film Festival. Afterwards is a beach house party. I want to go to both, but not if I'm still sick, which sucks. Hopefully I can at least go to the cookout. We'll see. I know that if I push it, I'll just get sicker. The weekend after next is my cousin's wedding in Temecula, so I have to be totally healed by then. I'm really looking forward to that one! My folks fly in to LAX Wednesday night at 7. I told them they'd have to eat at the airport b/c there's no way in hell I'm driving to that damn place in rush hour traffic.

Summary of story: PHX was awesome as usual. My heart hurts from missing my friends. I am happy to meet new people and make new friends. Traffic and being sick can kiss my ass. Oh, and pictures are up here.

There's nothing like waking up in your own bed after a weekend of heavy socializing and light sleep TO THE SOUND OF DEMOLITION AT 7:30 IN THE MORNING 10 FEET FROM YOUR BEDROOM.

They are tearing up our balcony--which means hammering the crap out of the cement. Then, in the lot next door, they are weed-whacking the back yard, as it has 5 ft high vegetation. It is taking every ounce of strength I possess to not put my face through the wall.

ANXIETY

It's 5am. Saturday. Oh no! I missed my doctor's, dentist's and hair appointments! I missed my meeting at work! I'm on thin ice as it is, and surely I'll get fired after this. My mind raced with my options. OK, I'll just stay in AZ for another couple of days. I'll go into work first thing Monday morning. Why didn't Marlynn call to see why I wasn't there? If I have to, I can find a doctor and dentist in CA. I can call David today since he's open on the weekend and get scheduled for Monday. I won't be able to try the doctor & dentist til Monday morning, as they're closed on the weekend. Crap! I was supposed to have dinner with Paul Thursday night and I missed that, too!

I smacked my forehead with my palm. That startled me. I opened my eyes and looked at the ceiling. This was not my aunt and uncle's house. This was not my sister's living room. This was my ceiling in California. It wasn't Saturday. It's Tuesday. I haven't left yet. I haven't missed anything. It's gonna be OK.

What a way to wake up.

I remember the first time I opened Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. I remember picking up my pre-placed order the day it was available. I remember the green wrist band that moved me to a smaller line. I remember how my throat closed and my eyes stung when I read:

THE
DEDICATION
OF THIS BOOK
IS SPLIT
SEVEN WAYS:
TO NEIL.
TO JESSICA.
TO DAVID.
TO KENZIE.
TO DI.
TO ANNE.
AND TO YOU,
IF YOU HAVE
STUCK
WITH HARRY
UNTIL THE
VERY
END.

"As long as I can keep up my work out regimen, I'll be fine." That's how I ended the last post. And then a week goes by and I've been to the gym once. All because I decided to start reading Harry Potter again. Books 1-4 were finished in 5 days. I seriously have been reading non-stop. Ben S and I are getting together today to go hiking, which will be lots of fun. He let me pick our activity, and I chose that over lunch b/c I basically haven't moved in a week.

Well, I'm done with my first week of the meal plan. I've never had so many veggies in my life! My parents are thrilled. Carrots and sugar snap peas and grean and wax beans and lots of broccoli. It's so great. I'm not hungry, and I basically eat all day. Breakfast, soy snack, lunch, soy snack, dinner. Yesterday's afternoon snack was a sugar free cheesecake the size of a cupcake. The crust was made of crushed almonds instead of sugary graham crackers. How great is that?! It was very tastey and definitely satisfied a sweet craving. I've just never had this much variety in my life. My body is getting all sorts of vitamins that it's not had before, and I feel amazing. I have a lot of energy, I'm getting good rest. I'm not snacking. I love it. If I can afford it, I'll probably just keep having meals delivered until I have a family to take care of. It's like having my own personal gourmet chef!

Tomorrow I begin having meals delivered to my house. I get bored with my food, since I'm just cooking for one. Having a salad every single day gets old, no matter how you try to dress it up. A friend is having meals delivered from BistroMD.com, and he gave me a few that had been building up. They were delicious, and very healthy. I would never cook salmon for myself. Or stuff a chicken with pesto and sun dried tomatoes. Or eat green beans. But I did all of that with the pre-cooked meals. It's expensive, but that gives me more incentive to work even harder. I've definitely been slacking in that area.

I chose the 5 day a week meal plan. In a month I'm going to do the Master Cleanse, so I'll have a week's worth of meals pile up and I can just have them every day. My mom said if she was single, she'd probably eat Healthy Choice meals every day. It's a way to get variety in your diet. And that was the main reason I ate out so much--just to have something different. I'm really excited about the meals that are coming!

I also just bought spinning shoes. The cages have been eating my gym shoes alive, plus they hurt my feet. I will be trying them out tomorrow. It was supposed to happen today, but we were having system problems and I got a call from the IT deparment as I was on my way to the gym. I needed to get back home and see if stuff was fixed. So that part sucked.

Yesterday I got a bonus check from work. I was planning on putting it towards my shoes and a month and a half of food, but then I filed my taxes this morning (p.s. all by myself online for the first time in my life!). I owed over $900 Federal and $800 State. Boo! So, my bonus is going to pay my state taxes, and my savings will handle federal. At least next year I won't have to worry about state. That's a nice thing about Texas!

So, I'm starting my exercise again. This week has been good, though I've been really sore. I lifted and took a spin class last Friday, same on Monday, yoga Tuesday, then a couple of days of rest (though I was on my way to yoga and spinning this morning). Tomorrow is lifting and spinning with the hot spin instructor. I used to think he was the hottest guy on the planet until I wore my contacts to class. Don't get me wrong, he's still an incredibly good looking guy. But the interesting thing is, my brain was filling in the stuff that was blurry with features I personally find attractive.

The brain is amazing.

Anyway, my cousin's wedding is at the beginning of May, and I'd like to have the holiday pounds that have decided to take up permanent residence on my ass shed. Mainly, I'd like to be in better shape. I have lots of clothes in my closet that don't fit, a dress I want to wear for the wedding, and a two piece swim suit I'd like to wear this summer. As long as I can keep up my workout regimen, I will be fine.

And now, off to bed.

Quote of the Week

"...can someone explain to me how the singing, dancing star of High School Musical comes off straighter than a professional baseball player?"

~ The Superficial Writer

It's weird to have a forced weekend. Usually I work a few hours on Saturday, but this weekend the system is down. Today I saw Race to Witch Mountain. It was a surprisingly AWESOME movie! I figured I'd like it, but it was really much better than I ever could have thought. The directing was great, the effects were fantastic, even the script was stellar. It's a shame that probably a lot of people who really would enjoy it aren't going to see it b/c they think it's a kid's Disney movie. That's too bad. I really had a lot of fun watching it with Faith this morning.

As I was leaving the movie, I noticed Girl Scouts selling cookies. Oh, joy of sweet delicious joys! I only purchased one box of Thin Mints that have already been partially devoured. I don't expect them to make it through the night. This is the reason I limited myself to one box.

After the TM purchase, I went to the gym. :-) I haven't been in a while, and I haven't done legs in even longer. I managed to strain my knee and was in enough pain that I didn't do my 45 minute spin routine. Pushing through the pain depends on what kind of pain. I should have stopped what I was doing, but I'm an idiot and wanted to barrel through the set-and-a-half I had left. Bad Ashley. So, I've decided to alter my workout regimen. I wanted to lift 4 days a week; two days of upper body, two days of lower body. I'm going to cut out the lower body lifting for at least two weeks. I'll get plenty of strength training with my yoga and spin classes. Besides, I haven't exactly been going a lot lately, so any gym time is better than none.

Tonight I head to iO to watch Relationshit! with the delightful Jude Shelton, then Step-n-Repeat, then LIMP at 11. I'm taking still shots for LIMP, which I'm really happy about. Tomorrow a group of friends are going to see Watchmen, then Faith and I are heading up to Mount High for a day away from LA. I'm hoping to be back in time to catch some sketch at iO, but it'll be okay if I'm not.

Monday is back to work, but I like this little hiatus.

OF COURSE IT IS

I bought a new bike this week. The one Paul got me for Christmas years ago was stolen. That's what happens when you lock it in the garage downstairs but don't look at it for over a year. Anyway, I was super excited about this bike. I even had a dream that I rode it last night. This morning I'm going over to Ben's to watch The Biggest Loser, and I was going to try my bike out for the first time. Then I was going to ride it to the bank.

It's raining and 50 degrees.

yeah

Hopefully it'll be all better by this weekend b/c I want to ride it to the theater to see Watchmen!

horrible dreams

last night i dreamt that justin, jastroch, and arthur would not speak to me b/c i was friends with tami and chris. it made me really sad.

this one i totally understand. the people i have been friends with the longest in austin are not friends with each other anymore. the theater at which i was hoping to work is still up and running, but 2 of the 5 founding members now have their own theater. the dynamic i thought i would be moving into is now hugely changed.

then i dreamt about a girl who was molested as a child. it involved her running and screaming and crying and almost drowning at one point. and her father was this disgusting, smelly, horrible person who was molested by his father who showed up later in the dream. the mother was away at work all the time doing something with flowers. when she came home from work (years had passed) and realized what was going on, there was running and screaming and fighting and crying on her end, too. and i think a shot gun.

what the hell is up with that?!

Time Travel

It freaks me out. I actually think it's already been discovered, used, the world has ended, and someone came back to sabotage the devices. I just watched Primer the other day and it got me thinking. If you go back in time just once, there's now this infinite loop of going back and going back and going back and there are infinite copies of yourself. It's uncontrollable. I guess that's what's scary to me-being that out of control. And thinking about how time folds in on itself. Please, if you're trying to discover time travel, stop immediately. Back away from your invention. Go have some ice cream.

Mmmm...ice cream. What a good idea!