It's about 9 on a Friday. I've spent almost 2 hours reading various websites of friends. I just added Kristen on the right. Check her out. We went to preschool together, moved far away, and ended up not only in middle school through graduation, but also in the same neighborhood. Paul is currently out with a friend from work. I am bored. I kind of want to call him so I can meet up with them somewhere, but he needs to hang out with people who are not me. Because he hangs out with me all the time. Sure, I could work out. That would soak up about three hours of my night (1hr cardio, 1hr pilates, streching, and showering). But I think I'll sit at home and feel sorry for myself. I have my film class tomorrow, which I love. Maybe I'll go to bed early, and work out in the morning before class. I have been getting some great feedback from my teacher. The 11th week she takes an audition tape to the four SAG agents in the area (who she knows), and takes notes on what they say. The 12th week, she tells us. 95% of her students are signed. So I'll know by December if I get an agent. All I want is to make enough money so that I don't have to have a second job. Paul's battery died, so I had to take him to work. Normally I leave by 6:30 to my stupid job where I enter insurance claims all day for $8.50/hr. But today I didn't even have to get up until 7. And it changed my entire day. I could so get used to that. I packed a lunch for both of us, go to see him awake, and woke up before the alarm went off. We actually were able to interact in the morning. If I don't get signed in Dec, I'm going to get another job. I've been looking around at other data entry jobs, and they start at $11/hr. Plus I now have experience. It's much easier to hate your job less when you are making more money. And money is definitely an issue. My film class is $40/week for 12 weeks. My plane ticket back home is $215, my dress was around $160. Et cetera, et cetera. Last Sunday I saw a girl I graduated college with on a Disney commercial. Then I saw a guy I worked with at Kings Island in a movie. Super Troopers. He was also in Grind and Cabin Fever. And Sarah is going to be on Cold Case (Sunday nights) any day now. Tosha's been doing a ton of stuff back home, and has two gigs she has yet to hear back from. So all of this makes me want to work so much, but I need an agent first. Catch 22. Elayne loves me and will put a very good word in for me with the big guys. I just wish it were December already! Changing the subject. This Sunday I start the pill again. For the past three years I've been on depo, and haven't thought much about the weight gain. But a friend of mine was on it for a year and put on 25% of her body weight. And the more I talk to people about it, the less I want to be on depo. But I'm not looking forward to the transition. The hormones of the shot will be fighting with the hormones of the pill for a week or so. On an up note, this friend has lost 7 lbs already (has only been back to the pill for a month), and hasn't changed anything else. I've lost 10 since the move out here, and would like to be down another 10 for the audition. I have a bit of a chin that I'm very self-conscious about. Plus the tv business is all about the body. And I have all these skirts I'd eventually like to fit back in. It's been a nice ego boost to fit in to a pair of pants that I haven't been able to wear. And I'm 5 lbs away from my lowest weight since I've been with Paul. Which was the middle of last summer. So what did I do tonight? Exercise? No. Have a bowl of ice cream for dinner? Yes. But I do think I'm going to take a nap until Paul calls for me to come pick him up. That way I'll be rested for my morning workout. He bought a battery for his car, but will not be installing it tonight in the dark. OK, so I'm going to stop staring at the screen and biting off my left thumb nail. I am going to nap. It feels good to make a decision. I've been so blah tonight. This is progress.