I go to my partents' today to do laundry, and the first thing my sister says to me is not "hi." It is not, "What's up?" It is, "I had a poop so big today I think I lost about five pounds." Then my parents jump in, "Yeah, your father had to go up there and break it up with a yardstick so it would go down the toilet. It looked like the loch ness monster." OHMYGOD!! I did not need to know the details like that. And I pray for the love of all that is good and pure that they threw away the yardstick.