Friday, December 14, 2001

So many things. And they keep happening. Funny how life is like that. 1) Over the past few months, Tosha and I have become very close, and I'm very thankful for that. She is someone I want to be like. 2) I went on a cruise with my family. Everyone should do this, and the rates are really cheap right now. I had a ball, even though my sister and I were the youngest people there. The cruise was made up of 60-yr-old Jewish couples. 3) I had this party and the cops came. When they walked in, there was a group of people playing chess, and another group playing with my Mensa games. I was reading Bible passages with Foxy Boy who 4) turned out to be a huge disappointment. Once you get past the foxiness, there isn't much there that interests me. So I'm not pursuing that anymore. Which makes me sad, because at one point I had convinced myself that I actually wanted to date him, instead of having random hook-up times at different parties. He's so cute, but he's such a schmuck. 5) Paul, who I thought was the absolute most perfect guy I had dated, has since shown his true colors. He's been with Jessica since Labor Day, but we ended up getting back together shortly after that. He told her about us--sort of. He never fully explained the extent of our relationship to her, including the fact that he told me he loved me. Then we for real broke up and he "committed" himself to her. He's cheated on her a couple of times, and it makes me sick that I'm part of that equation. I have since removed myself from it, and we haven't spoken since before Thanksgiving. I really want to tell her, because I know he never will. There was a party that I almost went to, and not only was he there, but he brought her (she lives out of state). I would have said something to her. And Paul would have never spoken to me again. And that's fine. Why? Because I actually take responsibility for what I do. In Tosha's words, "he's a scab." I don't even know Jessica, but it pisses me off that he's doing this to this poor girl. She doesn't deserve it. No one does. A relationship built upon a foundation of lies will crumble and fall. And hurt people in the process.


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