OK. Let's try not to lose this one. My cell phone committed suicide, my stocks are doing well, and my boobs are bigger than ever.

First, the cell phone. Wednesday I decided it would be a good idea to jog to the gym as my warm up, lift for 30-45 minutes, then jog home for a cool down. I may or may not have mentioned this earlier, but I have knees of an 80 year old. And I haven't been to the gym in 2 months. So, perhaps that wasn't the smartest thing to do. We live almost 2 miles away, so the round trip was probably 3.5 miles. I made it there without incedent. My knees hurt, so mainly I walked. Then I lifted. Then I called Paul to tell him my brilliant idea. He asked if I wanted him to come pick me up. I said that would negate me walking, so no. I was almost home--in the last quarter mile stretch--when I decided to cross the street not at a cross walk. There were cars coming, so I jogged. That's when my phone jumped out of my pocket and exploded in the middle of the street. I picked up what I could, but had to leave the battery behind as there were oncoming cars. Now, I've needed a new cell phone for about 4 months. It was literally falling apart. You had to hold it really tight b/c the casing was coming apart. No matter how may times I tightened the screws, the other person couldn't hear my voice unless the phone was duck taped. So to say it killed itself is pretty right on. I think it got tired of my constant fidgiting. I came home and put as much of the phone back together that I could, but still wasn't sure if it would work. My whole life was programmed in there! Well, being the genius that I am, when I went to the Verizon store to get a new one, they were able to put an old battery on it and transfer my phone book. I don't think you quite understand how proud I am of that. I mean, the thing was in four separate parts, and I had to do some re-wiring with tweezers. Oh, yeah. I'm good.

As for my stocks, refer to the Howard Stern letter below. It jumped up to $4.71/share today.

Saturday after the new cell phone purchase, we went shopping. I needed a new bra. Well, the one's I was trying were not working, and Victoria's Secret only sells my size in two styles. So I went to Fredericks. Mostly I think their stuff is too trashy for my taste, but they do have the smaller band width with the larger cup size, so I'm not complainin'. I still couldn't find one that fit, so I had the girl measure me. I'm now an "F". As in "F"ucking huge knockers. This made me almost cry. I'm not kidding. I've been thinking seriously about a reduction, but it would have to come out of my own pocket. Plus surgery is scary. So I'm going to do yoga. My friend Leslie, who teaches yoga, told me about a book called something like, "How Yoga Stole My Boobs". We talked for a while yesterday about different poses that would work. So I'm going to try to make them smaller on my own. I think part of the reason they're bigger is because I've been working out. Even though it's been a while since I'd lifted, I was doing it a couple of times a week for 4 months. So the muscle underneath was building. But yoga is supposed to lengthen everything. We'll see. I'll keep you abreast of the situation. That was bad. Couldn't help it.

Moral of the story: Buy Sirius stock. Listen to your phones when they want to die. Big boobs suck.