endeavors

Tuesday, November 03, 2009

nightmare


I woke up at 1 in the morning from a nightmare and didn't want to go back to sleep. I put a post up on facebook, and Faith immediately called me. It was only 11 in LA, and she happened to be online. I was so glad. We talked for about an hour, and I was finally able to go back to sleep.

Here's what I can remember:

I was kidnapped by someone I knew in high school. I can't remember who, exactly, but it was a female. She was holding me hostage in a hotel room. She would drain my blood slowly into syringes until I could almost not survive. Then she put some sort of drug in me that made me really dizzy and unable to control myself. Like being super drunk. She laid me down and started removing long strips of my forearms. The strips varied in depth. Some were just the top layer of skin. Some included the muscle and went all the way down to the bone.

Since we were still in high school, she would actually go to school in the mornings and torture me when she got home until it was time for bed. Her father would stay with me during the day to make sure I didn't escape. One day, I was going to the bathroom and I shoved an empty McDonalds bag into the toilet. I was wearing a jumpsuit and was putting it back on when he walked in. I asked him if he even cared what his daughter was doing. I was crying, and it was hard to hold my head up b/c of the loss of blood and drugs. He shrugged and folded his newspaper and said there were perks. She bought him new clothes. I remember he was wearing a wife beater and had 3 day salt-and-pepper stubble and greasy hair. He smelled. But he had an entire wardrobe of beautiful suits that he would wear when he wasn't guarding a hostage.

She would let the others free when she tired of them, but not me. I knew her. And I knew she would kill me when she was done. I flushed the toilet and the McDonalds bag backed everything up. Sewage spilled over the side and all over my legs. The floors were flooded. Just then, she came back. She was furious about the mess.

"Well, we'll just have to clean this up. It has to be done right."

She was really anal retentive, and we spent the entire afternoon cleaning the bathroom. She let me take a shower b/c she would have to take me with her to school the next day. But I wasn't allowed to tell anyone where I had been or what she was doing. My arms had healed. That was part of the thing--she would cut these huge chunks out of my arm. Sometimes she would eat them. Sometimes she would sew them back on. But every morning when I woke up, my arms would be whole again.

We went to school. There were people from all different parts of my life in this one classroom. A boy sat behind me. I forget who, but he was my best friend in the dream. I was trying to tap out my story in MORSE code on his jeans, but I didn't know MORSE code. I was really weak from the lack of blood, but she hadn't drugged me up, so I could function a little better. People just thought I was buzzed b/c I was slurring my words. They all looked down on me.

We had some sort of field trip where we were all on this bridge. People were gathered some other place, so it was just me, my torture girl, and Kanye West, who she decided she didn't like. So she roundhouse kicked him off the bridge into the water below. I ran to the side and looked over. I could see his body in the brown water below. This was my chance to escape. A few people had seen her do it. She would be punished! People started rushing back to the bridge area to attack her. Cyndi Gile was crying b/c she was a big Kanye fan and thought he was dead. As his body floated to the surface, he turned over and was holding a gold ball the size of a basketball and smiling. He was alive. Then he started laughing and swimming around and playing with a seal that had randomly shown up. Everyone immediately forgot about the fact that Torture Girl had killed a man (even though he turned out to be immortal. stupid kanye) and started freaking out about how he couldn't die.

That's when I ran into Matt Millard. He was one of my best friends when I was a kid, and I haven't seen him since he moved away in the 6th grade. I thought if I could just see him, he would know what was going on and would rescue me. He was saying hello to everyone but me. I followed him around in my haze and was finally able to catch up with him. "Hey, Matt, it's me." "Yeah, I know. I already said hi to you." "No you didn't." "Oh. Sorry. You got fat. I didn't recognize you." He walked away.

Everyone was then herded back into the classroom. This was my last chance. I knew that if I went home with her tonight, she would kill me. Shea Scott walked by with an envelope. "Do you think I can make it to the office, or is it going to be too busy with the busses?" I couldn't answer him b/c I was forced back into the room. I passed Jeff Watson, who was already sitting down. He said something that I heard as "Hey, sexy." *If you know Jeff Watson at all, you would know he would NEVER address a female in this manner* I looked at him, eyes popping out of my head. "WHAT?!!?" "I said heysouson." *Which, in my dream, was something in French. At the time I knew what it meant, but I can't remember now* For a moment I thought Jeff would figure it out and I would live. Then torture girl caught my eye and I sat down. I was exhausted from all of the walking around, and terrified of what was to come.

That's when I woke up.